"It’s quite simply a bad attempt at film-making. Bad script, poorly acted with some ridiculous and ludicrous twists and turns in the story"
It’s always vital when critically analysing a film to make sure you go into the film with a clear mind, avoiding negative preconceptions which, more often than not, lead to immediate disappointment. However, when you discover that a film’s leading roles are played by Vinnie Jones and Danny Glover, it’s quite difficult not to go into the film expecting very little.
And, despite desperately attempting to go in with a clear mind, I was even more disappointed than I could have possibly imagined. I thought that, as a potential saving grace, it may have been so bad it was kind of funny. However, that wasn’t the case at all. It was just so bad it was bad. So, so bad.
It’s an adaptation of Moby Dick, except instead of the fearful creature being that of a whale, it’s a dragon. It follows the story of Ahab (Danny Glover) who lost his younger sister to the mythical beast, and, due to having been mentally tortured ever since, is on a mission to seek his revenge and alongside fellow compatriots, travel around on a strange boat-like device, which magically moves with no wheels, to capture and kill the dragon. Ishmael (Corey Sevier), a younger warrior out to hunt the great beast alongside Ahab, is your stereotypically handsome lead male.
He can’t act particularly well and despite being set in what appears to be the medieval times, has immaculately white teeth. His accomplice Queequeg (Kepa Kruse) on the other hand, has horrible teeth with bits in it, and doesn’t say much – thankfully. Anyway, to cut to the chase, Ahab’s step-daughter Rachel (Sofia Pernas), the lead and only female role, and unsurprisingly the only other character with flawlessly white teeth, is also travelling with the other hunters, and is a love interest for Ishmael, as he not only attempts to take down a dragon, but win the love of a seemingly uninterested attractive woman.
In a bizarre set of events, Vinnie Jones, playing the part of Stubbs, a fearless hunter and old companion of Ahab, is actually one of the only decent things within the film… And he played for Wimbledon.
His cheeky persona actually works well within the feature as it almost seems that he is the only character that is fully aware of just how bad and unnecessary the film actually is. And he is killed off after around half an hour.
The film has potential in its story, as, essentially, the story of Moby Dick is just a group of humans attempting to track down and kill a great beast. It can work with any animal, real or mythical, whale or dragon. But then, if using a dragon, or any beast for that matter, you need to make sure that the CGI is half-decent and that, aside from the bad acting and countless clichés, it could be saved by the fact that it may be well-made and looks good. However, that isn’t the case either, as the dragon they are hunting is unbelievable and implausible.
It’s quite simply a bad attempt at film-making. Bad script, poorly acted with some ridiculous and ludicrous twists and turns in the story, making the film inane and absurd. I can’t really think of any positive features, I guess the idea behind the story is interesting, but only if done well. If not, then you end up with Age of the Dragons – which I’m sure is not what anyone would have wanted to happen.
