"“A thoughtful, perceptive and challenging documentary, carefully crafted and well executed...”"

Emma Davie and Morag McKinnon’s film I Am Breathing, is a poignant documentary, which examines the final months of a young father’s life. At the age of just 33, Neil Platt was diagnosed with Motor Neuron Disease (MND), a rapidly degenerative condition, which results in the loss of voluntary muscle function.  Happily married with a 10-month-old child, Neil faces several difficult life choices, including at what point his family should shut off his ventilator. 

Neil, whose gradual paralysis renders him completely dependent on those looking after him, started a blog to help raise awareness about MND and as a way to articulate important questions, most importantly: What makes us human?  What will we leave behind after we die?  How will we be remembered?  Neil’s first blog post states that his story is “a tale of fun and laughs with a smattering of upset and devastation”, a statement which certainly rings true in the documentary.  His humor and optimism shines through, making the film both light and funny in spite of its intense and somewhat depressing nature. Furthermore, it is these blog posts which narrate the documentary, his personal insight grounding the film in the emotional realities of his illness, and it is through this medium that Neil comes to terms with his condition and ponders what the future has in store for his family, in particular, his infant son Oscar.

Neil wanted the documentary to focus first and foremost on MND in order to raise awareness and in this respect Neil’s wish has certainly been fulfilled. Arguably, however, of equal importance is the relationship between Neil and Oscar. Striking and painful though Neil’s illness is, we cannot help but be struck by the loss of the boy’s father, a boy who was too young to even appreciate what he was losing. Over the course of the film, Neil writes his Letter to Oscar and puts together a memory box' - both things which Neil hopes will give Oscar a sense of who his father was. These little things remind us of just how much both Oscar and Neil will miss out on, giving Neil’s onscreen persona a complexity and depth and allowing us to engage with him on a deeper emotional level. Neil’s relationship with his wife and primary caregiver, Louise, is also one that resonates with the audience and perhaps the most touching testimony comes from her. Facing the prospect of losing her husband and raising their son alone, her minimal but moving screen time reminds us of the immediate impact Neil’s condition has on those around him. Indeed, it is the experience of these auxiliary characters that is easiest to relate to.  

Creatively and intimately shot, Davie and McKinnon do a beautiful job capturing and contrasting the superficial humour with the profound, overwhelming sadness felt by both Phil and his family.A film about life’s truths and simplicities, it is supplemented and in a sense captured by the shots of local landscape (although we could really do without the unsubtle and at time intrusive background music). This is a thoughtful, perceptive and challenging documentary, carefully crafted and well executed, which manages to distinguish itself in a year characterised by strong films.